Thursday, December 17, 2009

4-year-old gets drunk, steals Christmas presents



So at four years old the kid is already a cross dresser, thief, and a drunk? I hope Santa brings him some shades for Christmas, his future is looking BRIGHT.

72 comments:

  1. I'm going to take a wild guess here and say the mom already has her Ph.D.

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  2. I hope Santa brings him some shades for Christmas, his future is looking BRIGHT

    fucking hilarious.

    also she says "kids do things like this"

    Uhhh no, no they really dont, lady

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  3. Thanks man. As far as the mom? Exactly. Didn't you like how she said something about going to jail to be with his dad?

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  4. Couple more things here:

    That reporter is pretty hot, and that kid might be a damn good thief down the line. Breaking into peoples' homes already? At 9 he'll probably have his first bank robbery under his belt.

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  5. is that fatazz serious? she is embarassed? yes, so much so she went on tv to talk about it instead of beating the shiz out of her brat and taking control of him as well as she controls her calorie intake. geezus cryst. this is why abortion and all contraceptive devices should be free. FREE damnit.

    did you guys her about the other mom of the year? she was tweeting while her kid was drowning. then tweeted about 30 mins after the paramedics took him to the hospital. Awesome.

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  6. "is that fatazz serious? she is embarassed? yes, so much so she went on tv to talk about"

    Bingo.

    "did you guys her about the other mom of the year? she was tweeting while her kid was drowning. then tweeted about 30 mins after the paramedics took him to the hospital."

    I didn't hear about that. When did that happen? And where?

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  7. in PA. Apparently she is a nonstop twatter and her original twitter timeline (which was removed AFTER her son died and some other tweeters questioned her being on twitter, then now her tweets are private) shows her tweeting about her chickens at 522, the police records show a 911 call at 523 (from her other son) saying he found his brother in the pool.

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  8. You are right then. She's Mother of the Year material for sure.

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  9. I wonder when she's picking up her prize? And twitter is about the fucking dumbest thing there is.

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  10. let me just add, I think it is sad the boy died, especially this time of year, but I am so sick of everyone trying to chalk things up as an unfortuante accident. No. Neglect needs to be looked at and taken account for, no matter what the repercussions may be. You are an adult, and that is life. No one said it would go how you wanted. Why remove a timeline if you aren't worried about fault? Sketchy. I hope a thorough investigation is done and she doesnt just get a bye because she is military (I will start a new rant about that in a sec) or because it was a drowning death of a young child.

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  11. You have a "rant" about the military?

    Proceed.

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  12. People should have to get a permit to reproduce.

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  13. "If a kid calls his grandmother 'Mommy' and his momma 'Linda', he's going to jail."-Chris Rock

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  14. Hey Spurs. Holler at me tonight, fairly early if you can. I got into the dago red last night.

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  15. ok, here is my military rant. I get real tired of spouses or family members pulling the military card. So a fam member or your spouse is in the military. If I see 'em, I will thank them, but not you. What did you do to deserve any out of the way courtesies? You say it is hard to be married to someone in the military? Um, what marriage is easy? Yes he is at risk, he has an upstanding job, but last I checked, many wives of these men do not, they stay at home and blog about it. Real deserving of extras, eh? many peeps supporting this mom kepp bringing up her husbands status (he was in training out of state getting ready to go to Iraq while she was supposed to be watching his kid), as if she is exempt from public scrutiny or questioning (ie investigation) for her kid's death and her lack of parental supervision. No. HE was working and not there, not her, so technically, he is exempt.
    So sick of the entitlement so prevelant in America.

    I obviously need some Christmas cookies.

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  16. Hey Wop, when's the wedding? Looks like I'm gonna give the bride away.

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  17. Nice rant kinkyb!tch. I agree.

    In addition to some Christmas cookies, I think you need a "Christmas hug" too.

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  18. kb: Military spouses deserve some special treatment WHILE THE OTHER SPOUSE IS IN A COMBAT ZONE. Her husband being out of state in training doesn't give her a pass for letting her son drown while she tweets about chickens.

    However, if any segment of the American population deserves to have a sense of entitlement, it is the military community during wartime.

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  19. kinkyb!tch: How about a holiday muffin munch?
    Would two hours of that improve your attitude?

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  20. it may CBT. If I can bring my rabbit.
    I will accept the hug as well, Spurs. Before or after the muffin munch, I will let you decide. Merry Christmas.

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  21. Merry "two week early" Christmas to you as well. And to what do we owe the pleasure of you commenting during the day time?

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  22. I mean "one week" early. Damn, time flies.

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  23. I think way too many people take advantage of the prestige that comes along with military status. It is annoying and makes me question their motives.

    Since elfie is getting married before dg, I think I will give the silver skewers to her as a wedding gift. dg can bring her coconut covered marshmallows.

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  24. "Silver skewers?"

    She'll have his nuts on them within two months.

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  25. lol. yeah, but he will like it.

    I comment during the day sometimes. Mostly I read the comments and laugh.

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  26. He probably will like it.

    I appreciate you coming by daily kinkyb!tch.

    Damn, see? I'm in the Christmas spirit!

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  27. kb:

    I found that story about the "twittering mom."

    Nuts.

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  28. yeah, just bizarre. Mom bloggers are viscious bitches in Stepford Wives disguise. This story, I think, will go nuts in the upcoming week.

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  29. Maybe I should post it. Like "two nutty moms" in a row. But then again the story has already been discussed on this post, so maybe not.

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  30. "kb said...

    it may CBT. If I can bring my rabbit."

    You won't need the rabbit.

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  31. You'll just need a ton of alcohol.

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  32. I got stranded in Goat Gap, Arkansas yesterday. I truly wish I was lying about that. The Bronco blew a transmission seal as I was passing through Cinder Ridge.

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  33. "SPURS FAN said...

    You'll just need a ton of alcohol."

    Fuck you Spurs, I'm cute in person.

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  34. So is the Bronco going to be repaired? Or are you finally going to get a newer vehicle?

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  35. Spurs: Do you ever look at sites like "Egotastic", "The Bastardly" or "Dlisted"?

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  36. Nope. Should I? I need to find some good sites to steal some material from.

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  37. "SPURS FAN said...

    So is the Bronco going to be repaired? Or are you finally going to get a newer vehicle?"

    I'm getting the motherfucker fixed. The Bronco is registered to the station. I refuse to buy a vehicle until I absolutely have to. Besides, I have immunity from the state cops when I drive that thing (I grew up with most of the local cops or with their daddies). The cops here are our biggest fans.

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  38. KB: Thank you! I too am sick of the military entitlement bullshit, but rarely say anything since its so fucking taboo.

    I mean lets be honestly, rarely is it that a military member is there because he wants to serve his country proud like the old days. Its mostly people that are too stupid for college and dont want to flip burgers for the rest of their lives, who serve.

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  39. CBT: Wined up huh?

    wedding next spring

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  40. "SPURS FAN said...

    Nope. Should I? I need to find some good sites to steal some material from."

    I wouldn't say steal their content, but you might check them out to get an idea of the kind of stuff they post. I guarantee that's where Nik got his ideas.

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  41. "WTD said...

    CBT: Wined up huh?

    wedding next spring"

    I drank a half dozen glasses of Riunite Lambrusco, you know, grape soda with an alcohol content.

    Spring, huh? I think you need to marry her now, before she comes to her senses.

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  42. "WTD said...

    I mean lets be honestly, rarely is it that a military member is there because he wants to serve his country proud like the old days. Its mostly people that are too stupid for college and dont want to flip burgers for the rest of their lives, who serve."

    I agree there's some of that, but a lot of the young soldiers I know do have the desire to serve their country.

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  43. My benefactor, Drew, says we have hit the mother lode and we are moving to a farm. Apparently the fat, pretty girl he had rhinoceros sex with last night is quite wealthy. My benefactor, Drew, says that there will be an unlimited variety of fowl for me to have sex with. I am very excited.

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  44. Angela (the Craigslist Whore) will be very angry. She is a bitch and I do not think she likes me. She kept telling me to shut the fuck up when I was singing the traditional Pirates at the Tiki Bar song.

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  45. I don't think you'll have to worry about "Angela" anymore Avery.

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  46. THIS KID IS COOL AS FUCK. If I wasnt a virgin Id think he's my son

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  47. "Intentionally Left Blank Says:

    December 17th, 2009 at 3:23 pm
    Greetings from Colorado, sweaty! I really enjoy your blog, it’s just swell. I’m lonely. Can you write a blog post about me? Warning, I’m a bit of a pill and I spend a lot of time, I mean A LOT of time, stirring things up on the internet, but I’ll love you if you just let me!"

    I found this comment on a news story about some old dude in Sweden slapping a kid for calling him an Old Fart. Anyway, apparently our Anonymous comments elsewhere.

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  48. apparently, CBT does also.

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  49. Spurs, you should have Drew hook you up with a phone so that you can give us Twitter-style updates from the company Christmas party. You can even post a pic of yourself in that ugly sweater for us all.

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  50. I don't think I'll be "Twittering" from a Christmas party or from anywhere anytime soon Bitchhog.

    Which means there won't be any pics posted either. I know you are quite sad now.

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  51. Hi freaks. I see Fat Boy has a girlfriend now. She has I surprise coming. I just got back from the free clinic. I knew better than to take an extra $100 to let that fat motherfucker go bareback.

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  52. That sucks. Sorry about your luck.

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  53. BitchHog, if I tucked my greg so that it looked like a vagina would u love me?

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  54. That's not me commenting as her man, hate to break it to you.

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  55. Damn Drew, I'm surprised the smooth manner you approached bitchhog didn't work.

    Can't believe she said no.

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  56. man I am hung over

    Drew gots mad game yo.

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  57. I think I know who posts under CLW

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  58. Hey, go take a look the newest post.

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