Wednesday, January 13, 2010
Roxxxy, the world's first sex robot
Five different personalities? Sounds about right. She even "talks" too (sadly). One of her lines is, "You have a nice weiner." Thanks Roxxxy, I agree. But that was thoughtful of you.
Hey Chief and Pelican: Time to start saving. I still think Drew's Afternoon Delight is a better bargain, but hey, sometimes it's okay to splurge.
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looks like drews afternoon delight has gone high tech. too bad he didnt get a patent on it.
ReplyDeleteI know. He could be rich. I read where the thing cost $6,000.
ReplyDelete$6,000? really? well, it beats having to pay for a real life girlfriend. plus you dont have to deal with the drama of her being able to speak.
ReplyDeleteGreat point. And when you get tired of her, you can just toss her into a bathtub or lake to electrocute her. Or you can bury her.
ReplyDeleteAnd then cops won't even care.
hhhhmmm...let me see, you dont have to buy her clothes, birthday gifts, christmas gifts, valentines gifts, no anniversary gifts, no bitching or complaining, she doesnt talk back. she is meant to be what a woman should be.....a cumdumpster. PERFECT!
ReplyDeleteI don't think that comment is going to win you any female fans regular anonymous. But yeah, I mean even at $6,000 it's probably a bargain. No STD's either. Don't forget that.
ReplyDeleteeven if she was a human im sure the cops still wouldnt care. remember that cop in chicago that is suspected of killing 2 of his wives. even cops hate their wives.
ReplyDeleteWell, I think the cops do care. Just not when it's one of their own. I mean, look at Scott Peterson. The cops were dead set on busting that clown. His stupid fishing story wasn't good. Of course, a washed up corpse on the beach didn't help his cause either.
ReplyDeleteas if i give a shit about what any of these broads on here think. well, maybe lamp because shes cool. but then again lamp isnt a twat. oh, and dont forget that the robot cant get knocked up.
ReplyDeleteAnother good point. She can't get knocked up. You know, I'm about to pull out my credit card.
ReplyDeleteYo my nigga, i met one ov deez bitches befoe. Yeah, nigga, my cuzzin MPizil had one yo
ReplyDeletewhen you are going to sink a body make sure it stays underwater. tie weights to their feet. 10 lbs on each one should do until the fish and other water life begin to eat the corpse.
ReplyDeleteDa head was mad nice my nigga
ReplyDeleteSeems like you've given that some thought Anonymous.
ReplyDeleteHello Chauncey.
ReplyDeletei have spurs....i have. i have thought of several ways to kill somebody and how to hide the body. i think about everything the cops would look for and i have also asked my cousin (whos a homicide detective)what they look for.
ReplyDeleteNo shit? You think you could get away with it?
ReplyDeletewater ruins and destroys alot of evidence. thats why its good to dump a body in a lake or in the ocean. the ocean would be the best bet tho.
ReplyDeletei know of people that have gotten away with it. seriously.
ReplyDeleteYeah, the ocean would be good. But then you have to worry about the cops searching your car, the person's house, all that shit.
ReplyDeleteuse a truck and hide the body in the bed and cover it with a tarp. or if you are gonna use a boat, hide the body there until you are gonna dump it. then when all is said and done go to a carwash and vacuum your vehicle or boat that way you can get rid of the fiber evidence.
ReplyDeleteand put 'krazy glue' on your fingertips to cover the prints.
ReplyDeleteKrazy glue huh? That's a damn good idea.
ReplyDeleteyeah...plus you still have your dexterity on your fingertips. and its not as obvious as gloves.
ReplyDeleteWouldn't gloves be better though?
ReplyDeleteYou also have idenifing prints on your palms (krazy glue your whole hand?) and just vaccuming your car will not remove all fibers or fluids.
ReplyDeleteand if you are going to shoot somebody cover the gun with a bag that way the gunpowder residue doesnt get on your clothes as much. then change and go burn your clothes that you used. it would be virtually impossible for them to know if those were your clothes and if they had any powder residue.
ReplyDeletebut you wouldnt just lay them naked on your floorboards. wrap them up in saran wrap. its way better than a sheet or really anything else because it wraps tightly and is self sticking.
ReplyDeleteyou dont use your whole palm to put quarters in a machine. you just use your fingers. and the body being underwater your palm and finger prints get washed away.
ReplyDeleteyo my nigga, you just drive by dey hood and blast my nigga den dip
ReplyDeleteThis is like a Murder 101 post.
ReplyDeleteChauncey,
ReplyDeleteYou ever light up someone?
y'all be knowin my cuzzin MPizil? He showed me dis site. He da most natorious gangsta in Scottsdiziale
ReplyDeleteword homie, me and mpizil puts in mad work
ReplyDeleteAnd yet you are still able to use a computer. I think Chauncey knows how to get away with murder.
ReplyDeleteI wonder how many of these things have sold? Whatever it is, posting it here will guarantee a few more buyers.
ReplyDeletealso, if you get the chance break their necks instead of shooting or stabbing them. that leaves alot less fluids. strangling them is a pain in the ass because they fucking fight. and theres the chance they could get away. but if you can get them on their stomach and get on their back to have control, put one hand on their chin and the other behind thier head, then twist as hard as you can. you will know when their neck is broken because the whole neck and head are just limp. and they sometimes convulse.
ReplyDeleteProbably DG. I think I should get a commission.
ReplyDeleteAnonymous:
ReplyDeleteI'm beginning to get a little scared.
?
ReplyDeleteMore likely a discount for you.
ReplyDeleteI'm just playing. I just don't want you to come snap my neck.
ReplyDeleteOr someone else might read your advice, and then I'll have my neck snapped and I'll be swimming with the fish.
ReplyDeleteDG:
ReplyDeleteThere you go. Maybe I should work out a deal with the inventor.
I wonder what the inventor is like in real life. Now that to me is scary.
ReplyDeleteDG:
ReplyDeleteHere's the site. http://www.truecompanion.com/
I think they are working on a mail version too.
*male* version.
ReplyDeleteAnonymous:
ReplyDeleteKind of makes you wonder how many times the inventor tried out his invention.
I saw a video of a guy having sex with one of these dolls. It looked like a dead body. But he was really into it.
ReplyDeleteYou watch some sick videos DG.
ReplyDeleteI doubt the male version would sell very well. There are too many man whores willing to give it up at anytime or place.
ReplyDeleteJust like they are opening a male prostitute business in Nevada. Nobody is going to go to that.
Yeah, I read about that too. I mean, you have to wonder what type of women will go to that joint.
ReplyDeleteyouporn has everything you can imagine. So of course I decided to look at only the weird stuff.
ReplyDeleteNothing wrong with that.
ReplyDeleteNot only that, what do these women look like that decided to drive that far. It's different with girls. We can just lay there and pretend to like something but a guy actually has to put thought into it. I just don't know how that will work.
ReplyDeleteNow I think gay male prostitution would be huge. There are alot of in the closet men that would go out there to try it out.
"Not only that, what do these women look like that decided to drive that far."
ReplyDeleteThey are probably 10's.
And as far as the gay male prostitution? That's probably going to happen out there.
i dont see myself buying or using one of these things simply because this robot cant make a sandwich. but how did they replicate the axe wound? like who decided it felt like the right thing?
ReplyDeleteI wonder what type of money they will make. You should apply. I wonder if they do a line up like at the Cathouse and you just have to hope to be picked.
ReplyDeleteAnonymous:
ReplyDeleteThat's the thing. The "axe wound" (nice term) was designed by the inventor. I mean, you are trusting that guy to deliver a good product.
DG:
ReplyDeleteI don't think I'll be applying anytime soon. But thanks for the career advice.
oh elfie, for the palm prints you use elmers school glue. fyi.
ReplyDeleteWhat if you went to your friends house and opened up the closet and saw this thing shoved in it? Do you ask him about it or pretend like you never saw it?
ReplyDeletei havent been to the website but i have a strong feeling this might be invented by some japanese guy?
ReplyDeleteDG:
ReplyDeleteNo, I'd laugh and ask about it.
Anonymous:
ReplyDeleteNo, the guy is white. He's at the beginning introducing it.
Would you ask to borrow it?
ReplyDeleteNevermind anonymous. I ended up posting a shorter version of the video. But yeah, the guy is white.
ReplyDeletethis just seems like something from japan. they are into the whole robot thing so i naturally kinda suspected.
ReplyDeleteThe inventor can't be american though but it looks like it is aimed at americans. I just don't know why they couldn't record a better voice.
ReplyDeleteYeah, it's like those little cartoon voices that were made about Hollywood and his people.
ReplyDeleteOh, and RQ made one as well.
Why would you clean her with bleach and a fire hose? Just because someone used her before simply means she is no longer a virgin.
ReplyDeletecheck out this sex doll pimp.
ReplyDeletehttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BZ7Toxe0Tpo
haha or the voices from those monk-e-mail.
ReplyDeletehttp://host-d.oddcast.com/php/application_UI/doorId=137/clientId=49/?mid=
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_r0eRQ_0C-I
ReplyDeleteIt's Douglas Hines. He used to be an engineer with Bell Labs Artificial Intelligence. So the guy is pretty smart.
That video was a sneak peak into Spurs future.
ReplyDeleteDG:
ReplyDeleteBecause the "fluids" might still be around. Besides, I want a fresh robot.
I'm referring to the pimp one. I didn't know all of you were going to come in after that and post videos.
ReplyDeleteI wonder who the real girl was that made that japanese guy so bitter.
ReplyDeleteSneak peak into my future huh DG?
ReplyDeleteGood one.
but if you had 100 real girlfriend that number would be higher.
ReplyDeletegirlfriends*
ReplyDeleteCheck out this winner....
ReplyDeletehttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xrvbj2aRT1I&NR=1
Streets:
ReplyDeleteMonk-E-Mail?
Nice.
Deeg does find the weirdest videos. But I like when she passes them on.
ReplyDeleteI am going to get Drew one of these for Valentine's Day.
lets see....170,000/100=1,700 per gf. not bad really considering that thats a one time fee.
ReplyDeleteYep, Davechat is a winner.
ReplyDeleteImagine if Davechat was your grown kid living with you knowing what he is doing upstairs for hours with his 'girlfriend'.
ReplyDeleteI like the 2nd half when the guy from england checks to see if his doll is still sleeping.
ReplyDeleteDisappointment and shame would probably be in my imagination.
ReplyDeleteWho Everard? He must have worn that doll out and now she needs to get some rest.
ReplyDeleteThese people are creepy. They are better off with dolls.
ReplyDeleteAnonymous:
ReplyDeleteI still think $1700 per doll is a little steep.
I know he's a Laker fan, and I know that I was laughing last night at the Spurs destroying them. He's cool in my book. Can't speak for others though Chauncey.
ReplyDeleteBy the way, that's a nice picture you have.
ReplyDeleteYou look like you might be a "rock star." You smoke much crack?
ReplyDeletenaw nigga is you crazy, im dat dude, international playa Chauncey Mack, nigga dont gets it fucked up
ReplyDeleteI aint be on that shit nigga, just my moms, auntie and sista
ReplyDeleteChauncey looks like Spurs in blackface. The eyes are the same.
ReplyDeleteWell, it's good that you decided to stay away from the pipe Chauncey.
ReplyDeleteThanks Streets.
ReplyDeleteHey Chauncey, have you seen Elfie?
ReplyDeleteKeep smashing black chicks and your resulting spawn will look like Chauncey.
ReplyDeleteyeah i peeped da bitch
ReplyDeleteSup ma? When ya gonna let a nigga get at chu doe?
I don't think my "spawn" will look like Chauncey after I "smash" black women Streets.
ReplyDeleteElfs Let a nigga holla at cha girl
ReplyDeleteWell Chauncey i just broke up with my english boyfriend and your looks are kind of exotic...
ReplyDeletedats what im talkin bout girl, let this pimpin change yo life baby
ReplyDeleteYou don't know nann nigga
ReplyDeleteThat dress fresher than me
And you don't know nann nigga that wear mo' Polo shit than me
Bitch you don't know nann nigga uh-uh
Who do mo' freaky stuff
Eat the coochie wit the legs up
Then I blow it all in yo butt
Pretty smooth Chauncey.
ReplyDeletetater head got da numba
ReplyDeleteWho's "tater head?"
ReplyDeletedo tay have any of dees in white womens?
ReplyDeleteI'm not about to recite Trina's lyrics cause they are just nasty... but yes whenever someone asks if they can holla at me that song comes to mind.
ReplyDeleteYo my nigga Tamboozy, what it do nigga?
ReplyDeleteE-Feezy:
ReplyDeleteSo whats good ma, can a nigga get it?
Trick's homeboy is Taterhead... do you know what we are talking about Spurs?
ReplyDeleteWhat's going on Tamboozy?
ReplyDeletewat it do chauncey? wats prekin tonite at da club?
ReplyDeletewurrs dem white womens?
ReplyDeleteStreets:
ReplyDeleteNope.
yo spurs vanilla fase, do ya kno any white gurls me and mah nigga chauncey can holla at?
ReplyDeleteI think I just threw up in my mouth a little bit.
ReplyDeletewhere is RQ with my unagi rolls? Perhaps that will ease my queasiness..
ReplyDeleteyo beezy, wat it do? iz you a whites girl?
ReplyDeletedeez bitches aint even knowin bout da king kong ding dong nigga..whats up witcha hoes?
ReplyDeleteTamboozy:
ReplyDelete"Vanilla fase?"
That's funny. Kinkyb!tch and Elfie are here. They are white.
Spurs~
ReplyDeletehttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zRc4ac2iHFw
K Bizil, you down wit dis pimpin?
ReplyDeleteAnd please don't call in Jesse Jackson.
ReplyDeletegod that guy is ugly.
ReplyDeleteand how the fuck do people like him get a record deal. all he is saying is fuck a nigga fuck a bitch, look at my dick bitch while pouring out a 40. Who listens to that shit?? fucking idiots.
Streets:
ReplyDeleteCool. Thanks.
i need some carbbbbbbsssss.
ReplyDeletethis all fruit diet is killing me!
kinkyb!tch:
ReplyDeleteYou think he's ugly? Take a look at Chauncey. No offense Chauncey.
so beezy, wat we goona do tonitez? i gots a coupon from churchs chikinz. wat you say girl?
ReplyDeleteoh ho, by the by, my impala is in dah shop so you be drivin yo bucket tonitez. ya hear me?
ReplyDeleteThanks Chauncey.
ReplyDeleteand beezy, yo ass bedda be pullin up in a caddy. if yo ass aint in a caddy, then RENT ONE!
ReplyDeleteWhich wunna deez hurr white hoes wanna hook up wit a nigga? You can even get fat, shit dats moe bedda, all you gotta do is work at cho telemarketing job everyday, while I drive yo honda fuckin otha fat white bitches, and play video games and smoke weed nigga.
ReplyDeletebut cha gotta be able to hook up sum chikins
I'm so f'n bored I'm quoting rap songs.
ReplyDeletefuck yes he is. and why do men pose like that? that curled lip look? only elvis could pull it off and he wasnt trying to look like a tough ass while doing it. theyve got it all wrong. they know they would be a taking it in the ass bitch if they went to prison for half the shit they claim is so cool in their 'songs'. ugh, dont get me started, spurs. i fucking hate that behavior, it is so gross and just...demoralizing to everyone.
ReplyDeletecbt is so correct when he says he hates niggers, but not black people. get your head out of your asses, idiots. we are not laughing with you, we are laughing at you.
We are not the same, I am a Martian
ReplyDeleteSo approach my Phantom doors with caution
You see them 24's spinnin', I earned them
And I ain't no preacher, but here's my Erick Sermon
So eat this black music, and tell me how it taste now
And fuck Jesse Jackson cause it ain't about race now
Sometimes I think about my life with my face down
Then I see my sons and put on that Kanye smile
Damn, I know his momma's proud
And since you helped me sell my dream, we can share my momma now
And like MJB, "No More Drama" now
Livin' the good life, me and Common on common ground
I spit crack and niggas could drive it outta town
Gotta Chris Paul mind state, I'm never outta bounds
My life used to be empty like a glock without a round
Now my life full, like a chopper with a thousand rounds
Streets:
ReplyDeleteBored? Tamboozy and Chauncey are trying to ask you out. Tamboozy is even offering some crack.
I do not find ghetto men attractive.
ReplyDeletedat my hoe nigga, aint no otha pimpin can knock pimpin hoes, ya undadig me?
ReplyDeleteFuckin beastie boy
did that robot chick just say "are you ready to give in to me, stud"?
ReplyDeleteI think I am going to steal that line from her!
kinkyb!tch:
ReplyDeleteThat was passionate. I think Tamboozy is going to call the Rev for sure now.
ah nigga! speekin of, ah got some white girl to but me an xblox 360. nigga, come thru and we can play saints row!
ReplyDeletekinkyb!tch:
ReplyDeleteYes, she did. Along with some other things if you look at that link to the video with the inventor.
hellz yeah nigga, and I got da trees nigga lets do dis
ReplyDeleteyou know what irks me more? when one talks like a normal human being, then someone else walks up, and i guess it isnt cool to talk like that, so its like a fucking remote button was pressed, all of a sudden the ebonics and contributing hand gestures come out. what? didnt your mom ever teach you that your true friends will like you for who you truly are? why do they do that? it is so evident it is an act, just drop it.
ReplyDeleteLeave these fuckin klan membaz to dey meetin. Nigga Mpizil was wrong bout this spot, he said we could get sum play offa white hoes like he did wit some hoe name DG
ReplyDeleteDeez fuckin bitches be junior Klans Womens... dey got hoods and alla dat my nigga
ReplyDeleteand the repetiveness, oh the repetiveness. They could give Dustin Hoffman a run for his money!
ReplyDeletewhat up maine?
nuttin yo, what up wit chu?
nuttin bro, just chillin chillin.
cool, cool.
(silence while they smoke their blunts,
someone coughs)
so whats really going on wit cha?
bunch of autistic fools they all are, and they dont even know what they are really putting out for us all to see!!
maybe that is the answer? cure their autism first and it will all go away?
yeah sucka, we artistic. dats why we rap and you dont! keep workin dat telemarketing job why i be drivin yo accord.
ReplyDeletenow lemme and my nigga pop dat booty.
ReplyDeleteim a fucking genius, again.
ReplyDeletecounseling services by night,
curing thug talk/behavior by giving a secondary diagnosis of autism by day.
my gosh, someone out me already! i will donate 1% of my profits to all you regulars (no anon, you dont count), and a bonus 'what would kbeezy do' bracelet to the appropriate outer here.
sick o sell?
ReplyDeletei done had the diearears an i thougtz i was melting. for realz on that too!
ReplyDeletenow back to bitness! wheres dem white girls? where day run to? you cant hide frum dah dark!
ReplyDeletesomeone shoot me now, please put me out of my misery.
ReplyDeletecome outz come outz were eva you are.
ReplyDeletenigga, once i getz dis here beezy biznatch up in here, imma have her freestyle rappin.
ReplyDeleteI think I'd rather fuck Drew.
ReplyDeleteDo not hold that against me spursfansays family.
say wah? who dat nigga drew? he aint got wat i got. maybe you be racer afta all? you racer beezy?
ReplyDeletekb,
ReplyDeleteYou want to fuck drew?
That's it. I'm buying you a robot. I cannot let part of my gang resort to such desperation.
Hey ..
ReplyDeleteI didn't leave.
If Nik can't scare me off then Spurs site can't either . =)
yo pam, watz good?
ReplyDeletewell it was him or Tamboozy, Deeg.
ReplyDeleteWho would you pick? Death or dismemberment is not an option.
yo dis beyotch pam like da dark meats foe realz my nigga..
ReplyDeleteWhat it do Pam, you ready foe da scottsdizzy brotha train? Chu Chu nigga
we reedy and willin to let you ride the chocolate express. all aboard!
ReplyDeleteChauncey you crazy
ReplyDeleteThen I choose coma since death wasn't an option.
ReplyDeleteyouz aint skurred like dees here other white girls is you? day skurred of me gettin up in their guts.
ReplyDeleteim scared of puking up my guts you mean.
ReplyDeletedats the way you gonna be feelin once i stab up in there. you gonna be thinkin you got punched in dah stomachs.
ReplyDeleteDg, I think my current state of affairs is your fault.
ReplyDeleteI have seen what I've seen, and it cannot be unseen. I have tried everything short of scrubbing my frontal lobe. I'm scarred now. Mentally at least.
lemme help you take a doo doo. lemme get up in yo bumper.
ReplyDeleteya hear me knockin on yo back door? knock knock,let me in.
ReplyDeletePam, I am glad to see you here~!
ReplyDeleteI am still going to kill Linds though.
yo pam, you down wit dah darkness?
ReplyDeleteWhat did I show you that cannot be unseen?
ReplyDeleteyo pam, wanna kick it and drink up some tang and segrams 7?
ReplyDeletei got some red kool-aid too.
ReplyDeleteDG:
ReplyDeleteI'll pitch in and help buy kinkyb!tch a robot. The guy version probably only costs about $50.
Pam:
ReplyDeleteDon't turn down tang.
see? even ol vanilla fase knows wats up. tang is o.g.
ReplyDeleteJust trying to help you out Tamboozy.
ReplyDeletetrue true. where dem other white girls go? is there some kinda champagne room up in here?
ReplyDeletetang tha shit my nigga, but aint got shit on purple drank my dude
ReplyDeleteman nigga, i got yo back like dis here. check it, i can kick you down some henny. wat you say bout dat?
ReplyDeletei might even send over a 2 liter of some of dat sunkissed.
ReplyDeleteChauncey:
ReplyDeleteYou like that syrup?
nigga, you be knowin I likes da Tangeray with my sunkizzle
ReplyDeletesizzurp? whatcha know bout dat vanilla fase?
ReplyDeleteElfie: first the gay englishman, now you are flirting with these "brothas" aww my heart!
ReplyDeleteTamboozy:
ReplyDeleteWell, I've never had it, but I've seen someone on it. They were gone.
Shit nigga old ass white nigga, dont hate on us cuz you aint us. Dats my bitch nigga, she chose me, now we can handle dis like gentlmens or we can get inta some gangsta shit
ReplyDeletetip tip tip tippin on da sizzurp
ReplyDeleteI don't want tang
ReplyDeleteThanks KB =) .
Your so nice people should bow down to you
Spurs, You keep the tang.
I accidentally discovered syzzurp before it was even called that
ReplyDelete