Sexual History: What your number says about you

From yourtango.com:

While the whole "number" issue's been batted about more times than anyone should care to recall, the fact is the lion's share of guys don't spend a lot of time thinking about your number. But guys do care about sexual history. Here's why.

1. Disease. Guys without junk funk would prefer to keep it that way. While he doesn't want to ask, he's keenly interested in not catching anything that will make him itch, cause pee-related burning, disfigure his mouth, genitalia or anus, give him the cancer or compromise his immune system. If you're clean, he's cool.

2. Famous people. There's a good chance he won't be jealous that you f*cked the lead singer of Arctic Monkeys, but he will wonder if he's actually a cool guy, if you're still in touch and if he'd like to come to his birthday party.

3. Crazy stuff. In an effort to find out what gets you going, eventually he'll want to know the crazy things that you've done in the sack (or a baby pool full of KY). Talking about your past will also galvanize him to ask if you'd do something he finds to be of risqué, kinky interest (hello, threesome).

4. People he knows. Sure it's childish, but a guy doesn't like to be blindsided with "yeah, dude, I hit that," afer proudly telling friends about his new girlfriend. The idea of hearing "Hell, Lumbergh f*cked her," from a third-party, is ten times worse than knowing you slept with 11 guys during a particularly low self-esteem-y junior year in college.

5. Money. Did money ever exchange hands? Not to be too-too judgemental, but gold diggers are scary. Plus the hip-hop music has made us leery of trying to convert a ho into a housewife.**

This in response to the conversation I had last night with kinkyb!tch and Dirtygirl (both of them had their asses handed to them). Anyway, I thought number 5 would be fitting for CBT's and Drew's women. I mean, it's bad enough these skanks slept with you, but they also got paid.

Anway, thanks for sending this Wopness.

Oh, and Pam, don't sweat #5. Webcam action doesn't count. At least I don't think it does.